Monday, January 19, 2009

ONE Fete 2009 - The Aftermath

Who: WITCO ONE fete
What: All-Inclusive
Where: Queen's Park Oval
When: Saturday 17th January 2009
How much: Starting at $500 (last year: $400.00)

I swore that after last year, I was never going to ONE fete again. Worse yet when I heard that this year the starting price for the fete was $600.00. Oh hells no I thought. Got a call from my contact for ONE fete that I was getting a complimentary and another ticket at $500.00, so I decided I would give ONE fete one more go.

I got there just after 7:00pm and already there were long lines of persons waiting to get into the fete. The lines moved freely enough, provided you had filled out the back of your ticket, (paying $600 is not enough to get in, as it was MANDATORY that you fill out the back of your ticket to gain entry). Luckily I was obedient and filled out my ticket from home, so I got inside with no trouble.

I had one extra ticket to sell but I wasn't unscrupulous (rumours had it that tickets were going for as much as $1000.00!!) and sold my extra $500.00 ticket for $600.00 then made my way into the fete.

The layout for ONE fete this year was more or less the same from last year. Food tents set up to the right hand side as you entered, toilets and bars to the left, stage up front.

After taking in some Chinese (yummy) and suckling pig (bleh) I made my way to the front of the stage to hear the first performer.

Chinee (of Synergy Soca Star Season 4) was the opening act and he performed creditably. He got the crowd involved and they were moving and singing along.

Chinee gets 3 FY-AH out of 5

Red Man Group is a group out of Las Vegas who performs umm...stuff...I thought they were REALLY unnecessary...ah mean REALLY.

Thankfully, we didn't have to wait long for the next act.


Kes the Band came out and as per usual gave the crowd their money's worth. The woman behind me during Kees' performance screamed my eye off, she enjoyed Kees that much.

So allyuh remember my last review where I made a plea to Nadia to upgrade the outfits? Well like Nadia reading the blog! Two thumbs up and keep it up Nadia!
KES THE BAND gets 4 throw waist out of 5

Kes was joined on stage by Eckletik who gave a good performance. Though I find we coulda get some more soca in the mix, seeing as it was a Carnival fete nah, but that's just me.
ECKLETIK gets 3 out of 5

After Kes the Band while waiting for the next band to take the stage, I took the time to take a walk around the party and check out de scene. To the far front right hand side of the party, my eyes picked up this...

Which upon further enquiries I learned was a VIP heard me right...a VIP area in an ALL INCLUSIVE FETE! So this All Exclusive area was open to anyone dotish enough...I mean willing pay a 'lil' extra (I heard it was $15.00) to get Johnny Walker Green (big whop). Well yes...I reach! The all exclusive area was a British themed something complete with those British guards with the funny hats.


Up next we had the First Couple of Soca, Bunji Garlin and Faye-Ann Lyons. A very cute and pregnant Faye-Ann came on looking oh so sweet and singing "Heavy T Bumper." She was joined on stage by Bunji and then Edwin Yearwood, who is with the band for the season. Edwin's voice sounds just as sweet as always and he sang some of his hits both past and present including "Handle Yuh Business" Also joining Bunji on stage was Benjai, who drove the crowd wild with his 2008 contribution "Drunk Again".

Apparently Benjai being on stage with Bunji was/is a big deal given the fact that they're family and they haven't spoken in more than 4 years or something so...we got the history from Bunji, just in case anyone missed the memo (or even cared).
BUNJI and DE ASYLUM get 4 throw waist out of 5

So Machel HD took the stage and there was barely room to move or even to take any pics! Machel was joined on stage by Zan, (who looked like he was playing Fonzworth Bentley to Machel's P.Diddy). Despite looking fashionably challenged, Zan sang two of my favorite songs this year "Slip Away" and "Hold You Down".

Patrice came on stage and did her thing. At this point I really couldn't tell you what she sang as Zan's outfit was too loud for me to hear anything and I was ready to head home. Yes, I was ready to go home during Machel's performance! Patrice came on stage with the HD dancers who moved really well (I wonder if they giving classes?). I left the party while Machel was singing "Ravin". I did not hear Umi Marcano or Shal and somehow I doh think I missed much. I hope when next I see Machel and the HD they blow me away, cause they didn't do it in this fete.
Machel HD gets 3 throw waist out of 5.

Machel and Zan perform at ONE fete 2009


There were varied dishes from Arabian to Chinese to Geera Pork to Suckling Pig (after lining up for a while the final dish wasn't worth it) and everything in between. There didn't seem to be that many lines compared to last year and I had just a few of the dishes.

FOOD gets 3 burps out of 5


The regular bar had the standard drinks and the service was okay. Not great. I didn't spend much time at the main bar though as there was an Angostura Cocktail bar, and that was my bar for the night! The drinks at the Cocktail Bar had Carnival themed names like Midnight Robber and Las' Lap and I enjoyed several drinks from this bar.

4 glasses out of 5


Nasty. Stink. Dutty. Smelly. Very early in the night, there was no water, tissues or hand towels. Not ONE mirror! The bathrooms at this fete were not up to "all inclusive party/money" standard AT ALL. At least they were hot like last year.ONE needs to get their act together when it comes to those bathrooms man.

0 flushes out of 5.

Overall, this fete was okay. There was no WOW factor for me. If allyuh hear me say I going to this next year, just remind me about ONE fete 2009.

Next on the fete itinerary: Bazodee Friday and Wicked in White!

All music clips from

1 comment:

Wuzdescene said...

LOL .... except fuh de Chynee part ... I'll have tuh say .... dat we really went de same party! ... cuz our reviews are pretty much de same ... I see we are moved/peeved by the same things ... like de blasted NO MIRROR scene (wuz dah one?) .... and de dotish VIP (Steups) .... and the love fuh Zan's 2 songs (LOVE!) .... and I just knew you'd mention stuff I didn't .... like all the band reveiws ... cuz gyul .... I eh take orn none ... so ah really couldn't talk bout none ... good review as usual! :-)